Note to Self
by TomiShaped
Summary: A song fic, using the song 'Note to Self' by From First to Last. Its a little oneshot. Do tell me what you think! Draco Malfoy, a little sad. But most things are nowadays.


**A/N:** Okie Dokie Artichokie! Heheh. This is the fic that I mentioned to you in Deepest Desires. And if you are reading this and haven't read Deepest Desires, go read it when you're done with this!

This is a song Fic, using the song Note to Self by From First to Last.

Hummm… I did some Dane Cook quotes at the beginning of the other fic… so this one will be… umm… a few blonde jokes! Mind you, I have nothing against blondes.

Two sisters, one blonde and one brunette, inherit the family ranch. Unfortunately, after just a few years, they are in financial trouble. In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch, they need to purchase a bull so that they can breed their own stock. The brunette balances their checkbook, then takes their last $600 dollars out west to another ranch where a man has a prize bull for sale. Upon leaving, she tells her sister, "When I get there, if I decide to buy the bull, I'll contact you to drive out after me and haul it home." The brunette arrives at the man's ranch, inspects the bull, and decides she does want to buy it. The man tells her that he can sell it for $599, no less. After paying him, she drives to town to send her sister a telegram to tell her the news. She walks into the telegraph office, and says, "I want to send a telegram to my sister telling her that I've bought a bull for our ranch. I need her to hitch the trailer to our pickup truck and drive out here so we can haul it home." The telegraph operator explains that he'll be glad to help her, then adds, "It's just 99 cents a word." Well, after paying for the bull, the brunette only has $1 left. She realizes that she'll only be able to send her sister one word. After thinking for a few minutes, she nods, and says, "I want you to send her the word, 'comfortable.' The telegraph operator shakes his head. "How is she ever going to know that you want her to hitch the trailer to your pickup truck and drive out here to haul that bull back to your ranch if you send her the word, 'comfortable?'" The brunette explains, "My sister's blonde. She'll read it very slowly."

Okay! I am done with the funniness. And yes, you know it's funny. :P

On to the story!

Read and review!

Love Always,

Wish x Me x Dead,

xx-Kari-xx

**Thank Yous: **Will be posted on the next chapter of Deepest Desires, since this is a one shot.

**DISCLAIMER:** I do not own Harry Potter & Co. They all belong to J.K.R. & Co.

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**Reminders:** _Italicized _things is the words to the song, and **_bold and italicized_ **things are flashbacks.

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_**Note To Self**_

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_Two roads... split off from here, _

_And my life goes running in opposite directions._

_Exaggerating the barrier between who I am, and who I want to be._

Draco looked out the window of his so called room in the manor. He had felt like a prisoner here for the last few months. He looks out the window into the grey sky above him. It hardly ever seemed like the sun came out. He missed the sun-shine, though would never really admit that.

_I wanted to be that breath of fresh air, _

_When everything smelled so insincere._

"_**What do you mean your gay?" Lucius said with ice clinging to every word.**_

"_**I… I am gay, father." Draco said, trying to stand up straight and not fear under his fathers cold tone.**_

"_**I won't allow it. No son of mine is going to be gay." Lucius said, as though he could just change his sons sexuality with a few simple, or perhaps not so simple, words.**_

"_**Father, I can not just stop being gay. I'm in love!"**_

"_**In love? You are too young to know what love even is."**_

"_**You're wrong!" Draco yelled.**_

_**Lucius slapped him hard in the face, making Draco fall hard to the ground. "Are you disagreeing with me, Draco?"**_

_**Draco flinched at his fathers tone once more, "No, sir."**_

"_**You are coming home. No more talk of this 'gay' thing."**_

"_**But father-"**_

"_**No 'buts,' Draco. You will not be gay if I have to kill you to keep you from men."**_

_But this taste still lingers in my mouth, _

_Deceit has ways of sticking around._

_And I'm ready to disappear, _

_Vacation seems far, seems far from here._

Tears roll down his face. He couldn't think about that anymore. Even though he told his father that he was not gay, he was still not allowed out of the house. "I'm sorry Harry…" he whispered under his breath, leaning his head against the barred window.

Harry… thoughts of his lost love were the only things keeping him alive in this hell he now lived in. Though precious moments of him and his mislaid beloved were slowly slipping from his mind. They were very few, but every one of the mattered so much to him.

His father, no... He would no longer call him 'father.' Lucius, that is who had done this to him. Lucius Alexander Malfoy. Lucius, the man who wanted to take everything from him. The man who wanted to take away the mere memory of Harry. And as hard as he tried, he was loosing the battle.

_Note to self: I miss you terribly. _

_This is what we call a tragedy. _

_Come back to me, come back to me, to me._

Tears fell over his face. He promised himself so many times that this would not happen. He would not cry anymore. But it didn't matter anymore. Without Harry, nothing mattered.

"**_I love you, Draco." Harry whispered holding the blonde protectively in his arms._**

_**A light pink flush fell over Draco's cheeks, "I love you too, Harry." **_

"_**Don't say it unless you mean it." Harry warned him. "I don't think I could stand it if it were a lie."**_

_**Draco looked up at Harry and softly kissed his lips, "There is not question about it, Harry. I am now and always will be in love with you."**_

"_**Don't ever leave. I will die without you."**_

"_**Never ever, Harry." Draco promised.**_

"_**Promise?"**_

"_**I swear to it. I would likewise die without you. And shall we both die we will be together in death." **_

_Note to self: I miss you terribly. _

_This is what we call a tragedy. _

_Come back to me, back to me, to me._

Draco moved away from the window. That was the last time he ever saw Harry. The following morning Lucius had come and taken him away. Tears fell down the blondes face as he went and sat on his bed.

Why did he loose him? What did he ever do to Lucius? Why did he have to come and take the one person who ever truly loved him away?

_I can feel my mind, wandering again. _

_Into where I don't know, and will I ever get home?_

_Time starts moving, faster than I can. _

_And I'm sick of this scene, _

_I need to break the routine._

Draco got up from his bed, he was restless, and he couldn't sit still. He went and looked in the mirror and scowled at his reflection. There was a bruise on his cheek and a cut under his eye. He grew angry still when he thought of the many other bumps and bruises from his fathers beatings.

He raised his hands to the mirror and punched it, smashing the glass into many pieces, the sharp shards falling to the ground.

_I can feel my mind, wandering again. _

_Into where I don't know, and will I ever get home?_

_Time starts moving, faster than I can. _

_And I'm sick of this scene, _

_I need to break the routine._

Maybe this was how it was to end? He was never going to see Harry again, this much he knew. He picked up the largest piece of glass and played with it in his hands.

"_**I swear to it. I would likewise die without you. And shall we both die we will be together in death." **_

He could never again be with Harry… in life. Death though. He could be with his beloved in death.

_Two roads... split off from here, _

_And my life goes running in opposite directions._

_Exaggerating the barrier between who I am, and who I want to be._

He knew he had only two choices. To live a life full of pain and torment from Lucius and the fact of knowing Harry would never again hold him.

He wasn't willing to do that. He held the glass tightly in his hand. This was the only way. He held the sharp shard to his chest. He knew he wouldn't regret it. He pushed the made dagger in his chest and fell to the ground.

He felt the pain as the blood drained from him, but he ignored it. He held in the screams and thought only of Harry. Thought only of how now he would again be able to see his love. Harry would come for him. Harry would meet him there, that much he knew.

With his last breath he closed his eyes to one last time see the image of the raven-haired boy.

"_**I love you, Draco."**_

"_**I love you too, Harry."**_

"_**Don't ever leave. I will die without you."**_

"_**Never ever, Harry."**_

"_**Promise?"**_

"_**I swear to it."**_

Not all promises could be kept.

_Which part of me is lost? I feel so close, and yet I am so far._

_Which part of me is lost? I feel so close, and yet I am so...far!..._

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**A/N:** Thanks muches to Tiffany. She wrote a song-fic before me which inspired me to write one. Yet, hers was far better and much less depressing.

Review Loves!

Love Always,

Wish x Me x Dead

xx-Kari-xx


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